I Grew Up

It’s the day after Christmas and I am finally writing this blog! I’ve been away for far too long. Being back in Texas these past two has taught me one thing: I grew up a lot over the past few months. My time in grad school has taught me to be independent. I attend a school in small town Ohio double digit hours away from family. I learned to stand on my own two feet and “adult”.

Looking back at who I was back in July, I was very much dependent on others for a lot. It was very much extended adolescence. I still lived at home. I depended on family to help with bills and such and would look to my mom to handle business-y things. Being away from family has caused me to be a bit better with money, handle things on my own, make smarter decisions and it’s taught me that I can make it on my own.

I live alone. Living alone has a ton of perks. I can do what I want whenever I want to: eat what I want, watch what I want, wear what I want, etc. It has taught me that no one else will do my chores for me. I have to clean up after myself, buy groceries, and create a space that is livable. I loved being able to decorate the way I wanted to. I love having a kitchen of my own so I can make meals and host people. I love NOT sharing a bathroom with anyone else. I know that as I move forward I can live and thrive in my own space. However, being back in Texas also has me in this odd space where it doesn’t feel like home anymore. Even when I was at UT and living most of the year in Austin, Houston was still home. Now, it seems like Houston is just a place I am visiting. Family is here but other than that my home is my apartment in Oxford. It’s weird but how I feel.

I also grew up in the way I think. As an undergraduate student, I often looked up to those with their degrees and saw them as the adult. I didn’t see myself as an adult despite being one in terms of age. Now, I am the adult. Students look to me for advice and guidance. Thankfully my cohort, colleagues, and faculty have challenged me to think differently. As I’ve gone through my courses and worked with my staff and students I have been charged to think more abstractly and look at things even more holistically. I did not do this type of thing back in July when I first started grad school. I’m no longer afraid to say what I think. My best friend has even commented on my new way of looking at things.

Grad school is pushing me to become a better and more grown up version of me. Grown up meaning able to think for and speak for myself. I am enjoying this. 1 semester of graduate school is down with 3 more to go. I look forward to seeing how I continue to change and develop over the remaining semesters. May 2017 will be here sooner than I think.

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